Ears to you!

April 27th, 2007

According to the Boston Globe (via Marketing Vox), some retail chains are branching out from loudspeakers as the means for announcing specials and encouraging sales. A device described as an “audio spotlight” beams low-volume messages directly into the eardrums of unsuspecting shoppers. This cuts through the clutter and din of the shopping environment, in an attempt to influence store patrons to buy certain items.

In related news, my apartment is filled with back-massagers from Brookstone that I felt uncontrollably compelled to buy.

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The Violence of the Lambs

April 28th, 2007

Last night was the Sprout’s belated birthday celebration. Belated because she spent her real birthday in Central America, easing the plight of the world’s poor. How do you best celebrate the birth of such an altruistic spirit? To my thinking, nothing short of a full bore, multi-sensory assault would do.

We went to dinner at Casablanca in Harvard Square. The food: delicious! She had the Grilled Striped Bass and I ordered the Stuffed Red Pepper in White Bean Crepe, with a Spriced Apple Tart for dessert. I would highly recommend it, although don’t go in a hurry. The service was a bit on the slow side, making us late for the next phase of our evening: drinks with friends at Redline. What a great time! We got to some some great people we hadn’t seen in a little while, and some that you just can’t get enough of. Whitney’s MSH colleagues were represented, as were the Living Root Dragons. My opera-singer friend Alexis even made the trek out from Hartford for the occasion.

The evening would have been a great success if I’d stopped there, but I was determined push the envelope. At 11:45pm, an hour when anyone with a lick of sense should be making a b-line for home, we went to the Brattle Theatre for the East Coast premiere of Black Sheep. This black comedy (presented by the Independent Film Festival of Boston) has all the elements of a great comedic slasher flick:

  • A troubled hero, paralyzed by an irrational fear of sheep, caused by a traumatic childhood event;
  • His evil brother, determined to use science to warp nature for profit; and
  • A rampaging hoard of genetically engineered, flesh-eating, mutant sheep.

Comedic Genius Defined: imbuing docile animals like sheep with a snarling, slobbering blood-lust. My one criticism of this movie was that its creators suffered from a surplus of comic inspiration. 20-30 minutes of material could have been trimmed from this movie without a problem, particularly some of the gorier parts.

Boyfriend Folly Defined: taking Whitney to see this movie for her birthday. I don’t think I’ll ever hear the end of it.


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The Bligh’s have it; Sadie ain’t so!

April 28th, 2007

According to my handy-dandy “This Day in History” widget, today is the 218th anniversary of the mutiny against Captain Bligh of the HMS Bounty. A little bit of research on Wikipedia yielded some interesting details. For instance:

In a remarkable feat of seamanship and navigation, Bligh navigated the overcrowded 23 foot (7 m) open launch on an epic 47-day voyage first to Tofua and then to Timor equipped only with a sextant and a pocket watch, with no charts or compass. He recorded the distance as 3,618 nautical miles (6710 km).

After Bligh returned to England and reported the mutiny to the Admiralty, HMS Pandora, under the command of Capt. Edward Edwards (yes, that was really his name), was dispatched to scour the Pacific Ocean for the mutineers. Pandora arrived in Tahiti on March 23, 1791, and within a few weeks had caught 14 of them, who were placed in a make-shift cell on the ship’s deck (inexorably referred to as Pandora’s Box). Edwards spent 3 more months searching for mutineers, and then set off for England. As Gilligan taught us, however, no ocean voyage is complete without a minor calamity:

Heading west through the Torres Strait, Pandora ran aground on a reef (part of the Great Barrier Reef) on August 29, 1791. The ship sank the next day, and 31 of the crew and four of the prisoners were lost. The remaining 89 of the ship’s company and ten prisoners (released from their cage at the last moment) assembled in four small boats and sailed for Timor, arriving there on September 16, 1791.

And now you know the rest of the story.

Cat o’ Fine Tales

In other news, I just heard that my pal Sadie is going to be moving to Rhode Island. For those not familiar with Sadie, she is the most prolific - if not only - feline blogger on the internet. (I’ve always wondered how she managed to type without opposable thumbs, but I digress.) This is sad news indeed, as not only will she be leaving Cambridge, but she will also be taking my friends Britta and Kai with her. Please keep in touch, Sadie!

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Do you know what your Prime Minister is reading?

April 29th, 2007

The other day, while driving and listening to the radio, I heard an interesting interview with Canadian author Yann Martel. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Martel’s Life of Pi, I implore you: run, don’t walk, to Amazon.com and order it. Then patiently await its arrival. It tells the story of a teen-aged Indian boy who finds himself stranded on a life boat in the Pacific Ocean, with an ape, a hyena, and a bengal tiger. Well…it’s about more than that…but I don’t want to ruin it for you. Martel’s text is as hearty and sumptuous as the chicken tikka masala at Namaskar, and possesses a vibrant, potent humanity that I refuse to blemish with a paltry attempt at description. If you haven’t already read it, do so as soon as possible. You won’t regret it.

In the interview, Martel described an event held by the Canadian parliament, commemorating the 50th anniversary of the Canada Council for the Arts. Martel and 49 other prominent Canadian artists were present, each one signifying one year of the Council’s existence. Of the 300+ MPs in the legislature, only some 20 odd members were present. Among them was Bev Oda, the Minister for Canadian Heritage, who delivered a 5 minute speech, which both began and ended the tribute.

Feeling that the Council’s contribution to Canadian culture had been given short shrift, Martel focused his attention on Prime Minister Stephen Harper:

The Prime Minister did not speak during our brief tribute, certainly not. I don’t think he even looked up. The snarling business of Question Period having just ended, he was shuffling papers. I tried to bring him close to me with my eyes.

Who is this man? What makes him tick? No doubt he is busy. No doubt he is deluded by that busyness. No doubt being Prime Minister fills his entire consideration and froths his sense of busied importance to the very brim. And no doubt he sounds and governs like one who cares not a jot for the arts.

Feeling that perhaps Prime Minister Harper’s perspective on the arts might be influenced with exposure to its more sublime works, Martel vowed that every two weeks he would send Harper and work of literature, “a book that has been known to expand stillness.” Martel also created a website, www.whatisstephenharperreading.ca, where he will post his suggested reading and any responses from the PM. The first book suggested thus far is The Death of Ivan Ilych, by Leo Tolstoy. Martel ends the inscription with a compelling charge:

I know you’re very busy, Mr. Harper. We’re all busy. Meditating monks in their cells are busy. That’s adult life, filled to the ceiling with things that need doing. (It seems only children and the elderly aren’t plagued by lack of time—and notice how they enjoy their books, how their lives fill their eyes.) But every person has a space next to where they sleep, whether a patch of pavement or a fine bedside table. In that space, at night, a book can glow. And in those moments of docile wakefulness, when we begin to let go of the day, then is the perfect time to pick up a book and be someone else, somewhere else, for a few minutes, a few pages, before we fall asleep. And there are other possibilities, too. Sherwood Anderson, the American writer best known for his collection of stories Winesburg, Ohio, wrote his first stories while commuting by train to work. Stephen King apparently never goes to his beloved baseball games without a book that he reads during breaks. So it’s a question of choice.

My bedroom doesn’t have a nightstand, but less than eight feet from my bed is a makeshift shelf holding more books than I can ever hope to read. I make an effort graze through them in odd moments of leisure, although sometimes it’s hard to find the time. Nevertheless, Martel makes a charismatic argument for reading. I’ll be keeping track of PM Harper’s reading list, and may try to follow along, time permitting, of course.

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Deal or No Deal

May 2nd, 2007

My software-engineer roommate is taking the plunge and moving in with his girlfriend this Saturday. My loss, his gain: he’s been a great roomie, and she seems like a nice girl. Due to the short amount of notice he gave me for finding a replacement, he offered to pay rent for the entire month of May. Although I appreciated the offer, this didn’t sit well with me; I’d have a hard time charging someone for something they won’t use.

Instead, we came to an arrangement: he pays for the month’s utilities; and in exchange for my paying May’s rent, he’ll give me six one-hour lessons in any programming topic of my choice! This is really fantastic. I’m leaning towards PHP, since that’s what powers this Wordpress blog. If you come back here in July, don’t be surprised to find Rich Text pimped out and fully customized!

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In praise of shell-fish-ness

May 5th, 2007

Never eat shell-fish in months that don’t contain the letter “R”. Dad handed this pearl down to Sprouty and I during dinner at Legal Seafood in Providence, after picking him up from the airport. This word of caution came from the old days, before the advent of efficient mass-refrigeration, and it makes sense when you consider that the months in question happen to fall during summertime. How about that?

  • May
  • June
  • July
  • August

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Requiem for one Sweet Pad

May 5th, 2007

This afternoon, my landlord hit me with some bad news: come this fall, I’m out!

Have I been evicted? Nope. Do they hate me? Not a chance: I’ve been a model tenant (their words, not mine). So…what gives? Why have they decided to give me the proverbial boot? The answer, dear reader, stems from the fact that this apartment was almost too good to true, right from the beginning. Allow me to explain.

After college, I took a job which required me to spend two years traveling, almost continuously. Since I spent 70% of my time on the road, it didn’t make any sense for me to spend any money on an apartment. In August of 2005, however, my situation abruptly changed. The traveling ended, and consequently the time was right to get my own place. I casually mentioned this to my sister Kara, who fortuitously found an apartment listing on the bulletin board of the JP Licks in Davis Square. I called the number, interviewed, and was accepted into the apartment of my dreams:

  • 2 minute walking distance from the Davis Square T stop;
  • Large living room, dining room, and full kitchen;
  • Washer/drying inside the kitchen; and
  • Cheap Rent!

The landlords, a very nice older couple living on the second floor, have an adult daughter who is carrying their third grandchild. The plan is for she and her husband to move into the first floor. This is entirely within their rights, since my lease is up in September. Still, they’ve always treated me very decently, and it’s hard to hold a grudge against nice people. While I’m not thrilled with the prospect of searching for new digs, 3.5 months is plenty of notice.

So, I ask of you, my legions of loyal readers: anybody know of any apartments opening in the Cambridge/Somerville area this summer/fall?

Note to prospective roommates: although my official move-out date is in September, I can be flexible for an attractive apartment.

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Logistics?

May 7th, 2007

Although I’ve never worked in HR, I imagine that most of and HR worker’s day revolves around reading resumes and then trying to make sense of them. This is no small task; people put lots of information into their resumes, some on which makes less sense than the chirping of dolphins. As a gesture to any hiring managers who be perusing my blog, I’ve created the Work History category, which contains posts dedicated to making some sense of my own C.V. I’ll start with my work managing “logistics”.

For two years, Brickman Consulting provided wood flooring consulting and maintenance services to a major computer retail chain, with stores all over the continental US. I was tasked with planning, organizing and implementing the logistics that supported these activities.

We would typically send traveling crews of 2-5 workers on multi-city tours lasting up to eight weeks, with as many as 12 stores visited. I planned travel routes, made advanced hotel reservations, prepared budgets, and made arrangements for the drop-shipment of expendable materials (there’s only so much gear that will fit in a van before you have to begin tying passengers to the roof with bungee cords - OSHA frowns on this). Some trips required us to fly into distant/remote locations. In these cases, I also made flight reservations, vehicle rentals, and shipped our equipment in site using land-freight.

I also traveled with the work crews to provide quality supervision, track expenses and to make sure my logistical plans were adequate to the task.

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Spam-a-lot

May 20th, 2007

All men look for love; many look in the wrong places.

One such gent just sent Kara an amorous email via Friendster; something tells me that he’s nursing delusions of fluency in the English language.

…i’m seeking a single lady that does not have the heart to tease me up with her sugar coated mouth, telling me she loves me, at last what she has for me was just to enjoy the sweetest part of me and left me lonely….. i want a woman that i could be with, with an endless journey or till the calls from heaven….

This is powerful stuff; Dead Poets Society woman-wooing stuff. His ardent entreaty continues:

Because I am so motivated by love! Nurturing is a huge characteristic of mine,
Not torturing.

I ask you: is there a red-blooded woman alive who would not swoon with delight upon receiving such a message as this!

The text of this Leibesbotschaft can be found in it’s entirety on Kara’s blog. May this serve as a cautionary tale against spammers labouring for love on the World Wide Web!

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Left side! STRONG SIDE!

May 24th, 2007

For those who may not know, I paddle on a Dragon Boat team on the Charles River. We hit the water about two weeks ago, and the vast majority of our practices to date have been in the blinding rain and cold. It always seems to happen this way: the build-up to our first race always seems to occur during nasty weather, then the rest of the season is gorgeous and idyllic.

the Living Root Dragon Boat team practicing

My team is set to rock and roll at our first race, which happens to be in Boston! June 9-10, come out to the banks of the Charles River near the Weeks Bridge and cheer us on! Or come paddle with us; we’ve still got several slots available on one of the THREE TEAMS we’ll be fielding!

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